Looking for My Fiancé's Lover

I suddenly came to my senses. By then, I was no longer under a dark night but on a bench in the rose garden surrounded by soft light from the garden’s lamps.

Nezar said nothing as he stared blankly at the glass paperweight in my hand. He had his elbows on his knees and his chin resting, making a pensive expression.

“As expected, there is something I don’t know, isn’t there?”

“I-I-I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Never had I ever shaken my head so violently in my life. However, the suspicion glint in Nezar’s eyes did not fade despite my earnest excuses.

“Then answer quickly. What are you waiting for?”

I was in trouble. Unlike my heart, which became elated with joy and happiness, my mind was divided into reason and emotion, and was in the midst of a thorough confrontation with each other. Knowing that I shouldn’t get too excited and emotional at a time like this, I calmly cleared my mind and exhaled slowly.

This was definitely a formal proposal. Our engagement to each other was announced by the emperor, and the marriage of Crown Prince Nezar was a very important factor in the process of restoring Caval Empire after a long war. Therefore, it was only natural and appropriate that Nezar proposed his intention of marrying me, since I was his only fiancée.

But I wouldn’t accept his proposal. If Nezar’s sympathy resulted in marriage and eventually ended, there would be nothing to gain for either side. Due to Nezar’s personality, even if he had a mistress, he would secretly keep it out of my sight. As a result, I then would feel his absence and become heartbroken in loneliness.  Damn, it’s a miserable future that brought tears to my eyes just by imagining it.

No matter how I think about it, marriage shouldn’t happen!

Even so, I didn’t have the confidence to turn down his sweet proposal.

“Give me time to think. I’m still not sure if I can handle the position of the empress.”

That said, I had no choice but to delay the answer a little. But Nezar snorted and took out the musk rose that had been tucked behind my ear.

“I’m not some small baron in the countryside… I am the Crown Prince of the Caval Empire, and as long as you have made an engagement oath with me, it was only natural that marriage will follow. There are only two ways for you to dissolve a marriage. Ezelot’s three young lords all died in an unexpected accident, leaving you as the only heir to the family, or running away holding hands with another man.”

As the musk rose, which was swaying in front of his nose, bathed in the chandelier’s light flowing from the hall, it cast a shadow on Nezar’s face, covering his fine nose.

“You, you’re not going to run away holding hands with some strange man while I’m still alive, are you?”

“Of course not!”

“Then are you planning to kill all your brothers one by one and inherit County Ezelot?”

“No way!”

“Then it should be easy enough. I’m telling you this in advance because I’m afraid you’ll say nonsense again, but you’re destined to become an empress.”

Engagement, of course, was not something that could be canceled easily, but I didn’t know that he would proceed with the marriage so resolutely. Now that this had happened, I wondered if I should just give up on helping my lonely future self and enjoy the reality. If that’s the case, I would accept the proposal with ease and enjoy the momentary sweetness.

Nezar looked into my eyes and threw the flower he was holding onto the ground. His tightly closed lips could somewhat show how he felt. When I didn’t say anything and shrank like a scolded child, he opened his mouth again.

“Again, that expression again. You’re really hard to get. I am already aware of that much, but this time I really don’t know what the heck you’re thinking. What is the problem?”

Nezar pressed further, making sure that I got his thought loud and clear.

“When I ask nicely, answer politely. Don’t come crying to me if it gets worse later.”

“It-it is too cruel for Nezar to marry a child as incompetent as I am. And you don’t even like me that way.”

At my words, Nezar grabbed his forehead as if he had a severe headache and stared at the ground for a while. It definitely sounded like a childish reason. When I vaguely thought about it in my head, I thought it would be best for Nezar and me, but when I tried to voice it out, it came out nothing more than immature words of a child.

“So you don’t think I proposed because I like you?”

Nezar straightened his back again and met my eyes.

“Hey, Kate. Didn’t I tell you to take responsibility for every decision you made? During the five years I was like a neglected loyal dog and came back to your side, what on earth were you thinking about?”

Because of responsibility, Nezar had cared for me up until now. I was able to fully understand Nezar’s words, but at the same time, the fact that he didn’t say that he liked me until the end made me feel a bit dejected.

How could he never say that he liked me, even as empty words? At this point, aside from the fact that I wasn’t attractive, my pride was hurt. It’s not enough to make me feel depressed, but rather agitated.

“Whatever you say, I can’t answer right now. It’s hard to find a man more handsome than Nezar, but at least there’s a man who likes me somewhere out there.”

It was me being stubborn. I had said that I’d find a man who had feelings for me, yet, he really wouldn’t tell me that he liked me until the very end?

Nonetheless, that was simply on my side, it was up to Nezar whether to annul this engagement. He had his arms crossed with a fierce look on his face, but soon silently nodded. It didn’t look right, the area around his cheek looked very stiff, as if it had been frozen.

“Fine. I also have pride, I can’t force a marriage with a woman who dislikes it. So, if you want to break off the engagement, don’t just bluff about it, convince me with your actions. So that it can be recognised even if it is not a legitimate process.”

Legitimate process for dissolution of marriage was usually directly related to infertility or succession issues. Though I didn’t know much about the former, the latter had nothing to do with me at all.

So, is he really telling me to run away holding another man’s hand?

“How?”

“Bring a man who likes you to me. I will never admit to running away. I will go to the end of the continent and torment you until your blood runs dry.”

Even though it was a calm voice, it stung and I could feel chills at the back of my neck. Especially when he spoke the last sentence, it felt like he was grinding his teeth all the while, and goosebumps rose all over my shoulders.

“The due is four months from now. You know that I can’t wait any longer than that.”

“You want me to bring you a man to whom I’d get married in four months? That’s too short!”

“The one who dared to reject my proposal needs more time than that?”

I had nothing to say back. As my momentum died, Nezar continued.

“Whether it’s one person or a hundred people, don’t hide or leave them out, bring them all. Because I have to check for myself what kind of person they are.”

He looked like he would bury them after checking their identity. Suddenly, I was terrified, but pretended nothing was wrong and answered with straightened shoulders.

“Fine! It’s not that much of a big deal. But shouldn’t there be an opposite case as well? If you end up with another woman, then we’ll be completely done.”

“Do as you please. It’s good to say whatever you want while you can.”

Upon saying that, Nezar’s face looked a little relieved, unlike before. He, who had not once leaned against the bench, now loosened himself and fell back. Promptly, he slowly turned his head and met my eyes. With a very bright smile, he said.

“I’m really curious about who you’re going to bring as your lover. Sincerely.”