Master, This Poor Disciple Died Again Today

Soaring through the fog, Sectgoer and Rogue passed over the other participants, visible only as flashes of color and light in the fog.

“You know, we could fly on our swords,” Sectgoer pointed out.

“Or we could let the duck do the flying for us,” Rogue returned.

Sectgoer nodded. “Elder Brother is indeed wise.”

In the distance, a huge wall emerged from the fog. Numbers crawled down the left side, starting at one and descending, matched with names. On the right side, a much larger number stood, also paired to the names. As they watched, one of the names bumped up the list, from ninth to eigth.

“Xie Hao… ah, that’s us! One of us,” Rogue murmured.

“Rogue, you know what this is, don’t you?” Sectgoer said, suddenly urgent.

“Huh? A leaderboard, obviously.”

“But what it means—obviously, we have to be high on the leaderboard to pass! This isn’t survival. It’s a points-based game. We’re moving too slow! We need to hurry!” Sectgoer said.

Rogue turned, watching the leaderboard. “Huh. Yeah.”

“What are you saying ‘huh, yeah’ for? We need to move!” Sectgoer insisted, pushing at Rogue.

Rogue pointed. Sectgoer turned. “Yes, yes, the leaderboard, I—”

The name Xie Hao flew up the list, flying past the other contenders. As they watched, it hurtled past seventh, sixth, fifth… all the way up to third. The number to the left of Xie Hao continued to rise, quickly reaching a hundred and continuing to climb.

Sectgoer stared. He licked his lips. “What on earth is Healer up to?”

“Who knows? Let’s get a move on, though. We’ve got ghouls to kill!” Rogue said.

Listen, everyone! This trial has a leaderboard. We need to be at the top of the leaderboard to win! It’s not sufficient to survive. We have to destroy the ghouls, and lots of them! Sectgoer cried out, projecting the image of the leaderboard through the node.

Oh, hey. Healer’s doing fine, though, Peak Lord commented dryly.

If—if anyone wants to come help, I—I’ve got my hands full! Healer shouted. Ying Lin—she had a sudden enlightenment, and, and that plus my life qi… I’ve attracted all of them, I think! It’s an apocalypse over here!

Rogue patted the big duck. We’re coming.

“Are we?” Sectgoer asked.

“Why not?” Rogue asked, his attention split between their conversation and the hundreds of ducks milling around in the fog below them. Three different groups of ducks charged at ghouls.

One of the groups swept in front of a sword-wielding cultivator, who jumped back, startled, then blinked as they whirled away into the fog. She lifted her hand and peered after them. Where on earth did those things come from? What are they?

“Well, do we want to associate with the other clones? If All-Heavens notices…” Sectgoer said.

“We’re already together,” Rogue pointed out.

Sectgoer sighed. “That’s true, but…”

“And besides, in the eyes of the organizers, we’re stealing kills, not helping. It’s fine, it’s fine,” Rogue said, waving his hand.

“Well… that’s fair,” Sectgoer allowed.

Rogue clapped him on the shoulder. “Don’t think like a normal cultivator. You have to think like us, like us!”

“Let’s go killsteal, then!” Sectgoer said.

Rogue grinned and patted the duck’s back, urging it on through the dark fog. Wait for us, Healer. We’re on our way to steal some kills!

We’re on our way, too! Peak Lord called. Ah, I saw Jin Xian headed your way.

…You know, I’m somehow less enthusiastic, now that you’ve put it like that… Healer muttered. He shook his head. Bai Jingwen’s already here. I think she was attracted by the scent of the other lotus beasts.

Heh. The whole gang’s here! Rogue said.

Down below, white blanketed the ground from the ghouls crawling toward Healer and Ying Lin. Ying Lin fought alongside Healer in the circle’s center, but even with her help, Healer and his lotus beasts barely managed to maintain the perimeter.

As Rogue descended, Healer glanced up. He nodded, lifting a hand to wipe sweat from his forehead. Thank goodness.

Yeah, yeah. I’m coming! Rogue swept his hand. Hundreds of black ducks flew forth, blasting into the ghouls.

“Oh, hey. Leave some for me!” Sectgoer shouted. He leaped off the duck and slammed down into the ground, smashing the beating stick into the earth. Ghouls flew away from the point of impact, and all around him, the remaining ghouls wavered as the sound of the bell hammered into them. Sectgoer charged into the ghouls, slamming left and right with his beating stick.

From on high, Rogue surveyed the scene. In the distance, giant black lotuses bloomed around the singular, seductive figure of Bai Jingwen, twisting their tendrils around ghouls and draining them dry. Green threads glowed in the distance where Jin Xian puppeteered a dozen of her fellow ghouls, tearing into the ones that got through her net of puppets with her bare teeth and claws. Peak Lord and Bai Xue threw fire, ice, and …is that a giant dragon made of light? –around wildly, lights flashing. In the distance, Zhubi threw his hands up and summoned a projection of a massive white snake, which hurtled through the ghouls, swallowing them whole. Sectgoer carved a bloody path through the center of the ghouls, and Rogue’s own ducks darted left and right, bludgeoning back their own front.

Rogue tilted his head and grinned, circling around overhead. Don’t call me Sectgoer, but I think we’ve got this one in the bag.

Oh, hey, Sectgoer grumbled.

--

Up on the viewing peak, the peak lords and elders stood around their crystal screens. Some showed the standout participants from the sect trial, while the largest one displayed the rankings.

Mu Bingshi grinned and stroked his beard, eyes squinted into a smile as he gazed at the top of the list. Jing Ruchen stood boldly at the top, with five hundred ghoul kills to his name. He nudged Sui Linli. “It looks like that Xie Hao’s performance in the first two trials was nothing but a fluke. Look, now Jing Ruchen is on top again.”

Sui Linli snorted under her breath. “A fluke? You think comprehending a body cultivation technique in the middle of a battle is a fluke?”

“Naturally. What else would you call it? Think of it this way, Sui Linli. Any sudden enlightenment like that is a one-off occurrence, no matter who it is. That Xie Hao was lucky, but that’s all it was. A lucky enlightenment,” Mu Bingshi said, shaking his head with mock solemnity.

“Surely, that’s all it is,” Sui Linli replied, nodding. Her eyes leapt to the leaderboard, and a small smirk crept over her face.

“Yes, indeed. Sui Linli, you shouldn’t take it so seriously when your disciple is surpassed. That’s all the further she could go this time, but that’s all. In another two hundred years, she can cultivate further and try again, and perhaps she’ll make it as a Peak Lord this time,” Mu Bingshi said. He lifted his chin and looked down haughtily at Sui Linli.

“So wise,” Sui Linli said. Her eyes twinkled with mischevious glee despite her advanced age of appearance. “Naturally, you should mind your own words.”

“Eh? Of course,” Mu Bingshi said, his brows furrowed. He squinted at Sui Linli, then glanced at the leaderboard. What’s she smiling about? My Jing Ruchen can’t be surpass…

Mu Bingshi froze. Ever so slowly, he turned to face the leaderboard.

A chime rang out as Xie Hao’s name supplanted Jing Ruchen’s, taking first place on the board. Below Jing Ruchen, another two names crept upward, quickly encroaching on Jing Ruchen’s five hundred kills. Jing Ruchen continued to kill, his number climbing upward, but he couldn’t surpass the speed of the other names’ ascension.

“What? This… this can’t be!” Mu Bingshi stuttered.

Sui Linli chuckled darkly.

Another name began to ascend, then another and another. In the end, nine names flew up the list. None could quite match the speed of Xie Hao’s name, but they all ascended quickly, more quickly than anyone else. Past the other names, past Jing Ruchen, leaving everyone else in the dust, they blew to the top of the list and continued climbing. The numbers to their left counted up steadily. Five hundred… six… eight… a thousand… a thousand five hundred…

Mu Bingshi’s jaw dropped. Forgetting everything, he stepped slowly forward, dismay written all over his face. “How? How is that even possible? How are they not dying? That’s… so many, it… it can’t be!”

“Oh my, could it be? Is your Jing Ruchen no prodigy, after all, but merely another speck of dust among the millions?” Sui Linli said, pretending to be startled.

Mu Bingshi barely even heard her, striding mutely toward the leaderboards.

At last, even the lowest of the nine names had two thousand kills listed beside it.

Eyes wide, Mu Bingshi stared. Abruptly, he shook his head. A firm look passed over him again, and he flicked his beard, once more assuming his usual overbearing aura. “Hmph. A mistake… there must have been a mistake!”

“Ah? Look, here’s that Xie Hao on the screen!” Sui Linli called out, pointing at one of the screens.

Mu Bingshi rushed over. “Right, right. Let’s see how this Xie Hao is cheating!”

Ghouls rushed toward the man, swarming toward him from all sides. A woman fought at his side, and a number of small constructs beat back the ghouls. Pale limbs draped in dirty white robes scraped at the male and female cultivator.

“Ha. He’s attracted too many ghouls. I’ll be surprised if he survives the trial,” Mu Bingshi said, shaking his head.

Sui Linli twisted her lips.

“Have you actually grown fond of him?” Mu Bingshi asked, shaking his head. “He’s the reason your Sheng Caiyi dropped out, don’t forget that.”

Sui Linli scowled at him. “I haven’t. But… his control of life qi is impressive. Unrivaled, even. It would be a shame to lose him here, over a small mistake.”

“If his control of life qi is truly unrivaled, then he’ll doubtlessly survive this,” Mu Bingshi said dismissively. That’s if it is truly unrivaled, after all! I haven’t seen anything extraordinary from this Xie Hao. He’s nothing compared to Jing Ruchen, nothing at all!

A beam of light descended toward the peak. Mu Bingshi and Sui Linli looked up, squinting. As they watched, the beam split into multiple beams, then resolved into a tight group of cultivators.

Gui Delun flew at their head, his white-and-gold robes swishing fabulously on the wind. At his side flew Tang Fei, his disciple, though her head was bowed, and rather than her usual cute gear, she wore robes strictly in the fashion of All-Heavens Sect, with no alterations. One of her hands was hidden in a pink glove, almost skin-tone but not quite. Gui Yutong flew at his other side, eyes locked ahead, refusing to look at Gui Delun. Chao Chengguang with her mobile hair and Shen Mang, still wearing the appearance of an elder despite his relatively young age followed after him, mixed in with his hangers-on. At the very back of the pack followed Wu Fanyun, arms crossed and a bitter expression on his face.

“Ah. It looks like the Grand Inner Peak Lord has finally deigned to join us,” Sui Linli muttered dryly to herself.

“Mind your words. There’s no such rank as Grand Inner Peak Lord. All the Inner Peak Lords are equal,” Mu Bingshi said, stroking his beard.

“Should I go ahead and call him Sect Master already?” Sui Linli snarked.

Mu Bingshi narrowed his eyes. “There are times when it’s better not to be too prescient.”

“Hmm,” Sui Linli replied.

Pasting false smiles on their faces, the two turned and bowed graciously to Gui Delun. “Welcome, Inner Peak Lord Gui Delun,” they chorused, in sync for once.