Missing Cinderella

Chapter 36 

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Upon his return, Eschert didn’t visit Siella. He seemed to have forgotten that he had been looking for her the previous day. Siella couldn’t even guess where he had been, but it was enough to know that he was busy. 

Looking up at the clear sky after pouring hard for a few days, Siella pushed herself up from where she had been sitting like a stone. It was a beautiful day, just the right weather to leave this place and start fresh to somewhere new. 

With that thought in mind, Siella headed straight to Eschert’s office, and unexpectedly bumped into Camellia. 

“Ah! W, wait, Miss Siella. I have something important to tell you….”

“Let’s do it later.”

“Oh….”

“Later.”

With that, Siella lightly shook off Camellia’s hand grabbing her arm and continued walking. She didn’t even bother pointing out Camellia ignoring her warning of not touching her body. There would be next time after all. 

Siella knocked on the door of Eschert’s office, and as soon as she heard his voice inviting her inside, she opened the door and stepped into the room. 

 “I have something to tell you.”

Eschert slowly raised his head. Siella spoke up immediately. 

“I am leaving the mansion.”

“…”

“I have already finished all the preparations by myself. I will leave as soon as the business carriage arrives in a little while.”

Eschert looked at Siella with a dazed expression for a moment, but then he came to his senses and stood up. 

“I thought we’re already done with that.”

“…”

“I can’t believe you’re still complaining –”

“I want you to be the hostess of this family.”

“…”

“I don’t think you’re someone who forgets what he said. Eschert Nocturm.”

Siella wasn’t even angry at Eschert’s consistent attitude of not even considering her position. 

“Siella, that’s –”

“Yes, that’s what you said to that woman.”

I was just curious. Had he really forgotten when he ordered Patrick to bring her to him a few days ago? 

“I’ve waited long enough for you,” Siella said calmly, “I waited long enough to say that it wasn’t enough.”

“…”

“Maybe that’s why my waiting became all too familiar with you.”

I guess it was because you’re used to my waiting, so you felt that it was trivial and forgot about it. 

“I’ve been waiting for you to find me first ever since you returned yesterday.”

“…”

“But you seemed to have forgotten that you were the one who held me back because you said you needed to talk to me about something important. In the end, you made me come to you first again.” Siella continued to speak in a calm voice. “I’m sorry, but I don’t want to keep waiting any longer.”

At her words, Eschert just stared at her with a confused look. Even that was utterly ridiculous to Siella. 

How many times have I told you about this, and yet you still gave me a look as if you don’t understand? How many times do I have to tell you about something for you to understand me? No, will a time ever come when you will finally understand me? 

“I have no intention of holding on or clinging on to you.”

“Siella.”

“I didn’t bring it up now just to argue with you.”

“…”

“I just want to make it clear to you that you broke your promise to me, and it’s time for you to take responsibility.” 

Siella was stern as she told him never to order people to recklessly hold her captive again. 

“Recklessly holding you captive? What do you mean by that?”

“Your people treated me like I was some criminal, you didn’t know? You’d better remember it well now.”

“…”

“And don’t you ever mess with me or my escort again.” 

Siella said as if cursing Eschert, who stood there with a completely confused expression. 

“I hope that your love will be worth it, so that even if you throw away all the time we’ve been together that have passed, you won’t regret it at all.”

“…”

“That’s all. That’s all I have to say.”

By all means, Siella hoped that Eschert would suffer just as much as she had. 

“So let’s not run into each other even by chance.”

As soon as she had said that, Siella turned around and walked out of the office without a second thought. But at the very next moment, the last thing she expected happened. Eschert came running out to Siella. 

“Saying to never see each other again – do you think that’s something that could be established between you and me?” 

Grabbing Siella by her wrist and turning her around, he continued, his face uncharacteristically flushed. 

“Did you think that by unilaterally informing me of leaving the mansion, I would simply say yes and accept things as they are?”

Siella was too tired, she didn’t want to answer anymore. 

“What on earth….”

“…”

“Haa….”

Frustrated with Siella’s silence, Eschert let out a deep sigh and said, “I don’t know what has been wrong with you since last time.”

I told you what the problem was, but you didn’t listen at all. 

Siella was simply dumbfounded as Eschert looked at her with an expression that he couldn’t understand at all. 

‘Then what was the point of everything I’ve said?’ 

Even after I gave him Kyle’s letter and gave him enough time to find out about it and make excuses for himself, what was all that about? I waited and waited even after that, so what was he saying that I was complaining about? 

“Haven’t we been doing well so far?”

“…”

“You and I, we’re getting along just fine.” Eschert let out a long sigh of frustration and continued, “I’m sure we were, but I just don’t understand why you’re acting like this lately after all the good times we had.”

“I thought so, too.”

You thought so? Eschert was about to ask her, ‘Does that mean you don’t think so now?’, but he shut his mouth. 

Siella continued, “I thought we were doing well, but you know, it turns out we weren’t.”

“…”

“It turns out that I was mistaken.”

Siella looked up at Eschert blankly, then shook off his grip from her wrist. 

“I don’t want to make you feel more tired than you already are, and it would make you feel upset if I blamed and asked you to take responsibility for all the things that I’ve been hiding and putting up with until now.”

Eschert had no idea how hard she tried not to resent him for always ignoring her, always telling her that he was busy. 

“So I’ll just say this, Eschert Nocturm. I didn’t always understand you.”

At the very least, he kept Kyle out of her life and kept her safe in the mansion when she had nowhere else to go. So she spent her days constantly reminding herself to be content with that. This went on for five years. 

However, Eschert hadn’t actually kept her safe as he had initially promised. 

“I tried to understand you when I couldn’t, and when that didn’t work, I at least pretended to.”

He did nothing. Not only did he leave Siella unattended while everyone looked at her in disgust, but he also made no effort to honor their contract. 

I’ve been safe all these years purely because of luck. Siella knew that very well by now. 

“Trying to understand you, putting up with you all this time, keeping my mouth shut… at some point, I started to let go of other things, one by one.”

Siella didn’t want to think about death anymore. She didn’t want to be haunted by the wounds of her past, thinking that she would rather die than live like this. 

“The more I give up, the more I can get along with you just fine. There’s no conflict, no dislike for each other… so I let go and gave up.”

“…”

“And then I eventually stopped expecting anything from you.”

I wanted to live, just as Edwin said, happily. Siella wanted to be happy. 

“And then everything became alright. I was no longer angry at you for making me wait when you said you’re always busy.”

“…”

“You knew my time was precious. Now, I wasn’t even angry at you for treating my time like it was something insignificant that you can just use it as you see fit.”

“…”

“I really don’t care.”

That’s why Siella had to leave. She needed to get out of this suffocating place to be able to live properly. 

“Haa….”

Even so, Eschert still didn’t understand anything. It would be more accurate to say that he didn’t even try. 

“What you’re saying is too sudden for me.” He continued to look at Siella with a confused face. “I’m rather bewildered. I don’t know what I am supposed to say to you right now.”

As Siella said her last, and final, sincere feelings, Eschert listened without a care in the world. 

“I’m afraid I have plans after this, so it’s difficult for me to talk any longer with you right now.”

As always, even at this moment, he gave a one-sided notice in a tired voice. 

“Let’s call it a day for now and talk again later tonight.” 

Let’s talk next time. Siella looked up at Eschert with a frighteningly expressionless face. His one-sided, selfish attitude of telling her to understand him, to wait until he had time – Siella was all too familiar with that, as she had seen it way too many times over the years. The only thing that changed was that Siella had no intention of understanding him like she always did. 

As if he didn’t really need an answer in the first place, Eschert silently stared at Siella for a moment, turned around and went into his office. Siella followed suit, silently turning away and walking away without any hesitation. She walked away as if she had never been there in the first place. 

Then in the place where the two people stood, nothing remained. 

(T/N: A relationship will only work if two people make an effort to understand the other. Just like Eschert, who is as selfish as he can be, always asking for other people to understand him, always want other people to wait for him, but he himself don’t make the same effort, then one won’t be able to maintain a good relationship with other people, romantically or not.)