Chapter 12 - There Is Someone I Dare To Carry In My Heart.

The Crown Prince’s birthday banquet.

It was the day I fell for Damian at first sight in my past life. The day exactly a month after I experienced death through his sword and regressed to my twentieth birthday.

This banquet was the first one held at the palace in a while, so it seemed like the maids who were accessorizing me were more excited than I was, who was the actual one going to the banquet. Especially Sasha.

“Miss, you will definitely be the star of today’s banquet!”

“…”

“You’re so beautiful. I’m so envious of the person who will get to dance with you.”

Sasha had the face of a girl in love as she looked at me. And I chuckled while watching the short-haired maid blush as she clasped her hands together in enthusiasm.

My reflection in the vanity mirror looked incredibly glamorous. My platinum hair reaching down to my waist shone brighter than usual, and I was wearing purple earrings that were the same color as Cassadin’s eyes.

“Do you like the dress?”

I looked down at the dress I was wearing. It was a blue dress that clung tightly to my body with a revealing neckline. The deep blue shade reminded me of the blue rose that Cassadin claimed resembled me.

“Yes, I like it.”

I was suddenly curious about what Cassadin was wearing. Cassadin was leaning against the wall, seeming to be done with his preparations, staring at nothing in particular as he pondered with a thoughtful expression.

Seeing him in that black uniform, I instantly knew that the star of today’s birthday banquet wouldn’t be the Crown Prince or me, but Cassadin.

“Cassadin.”

At my call, Cassadin’s eyes slid around to look at me. As our eyes met, his Adam’s apple bobbed noticeably.

“Sister.”

Cassadin approached me without taking his eyes off of me for even a second, taking my hand, then saying softly,

“I thought an angel had just descended from heaven for a moment.”

I just smiled back instead of replying.

Then we took a carriage to the imperial palace. Before getting on the carriage, I looked up at the sky for a moment. Just past noon, the skies were clear without a single cloud in sight. Just like the day in my memory.

“Sister.”

At Cassadin’s urging voice, I stepped into the carriage, still holding onto his hand. And as if it were the natural thing to do, my suspicious younger brother took the seat next to me.

And even after the carriage started moving, he seemed to have no intention of letting go of my hand.

“You can let go of my hand now.”

“Can’t I hold it?”

“Why?”

“Because I want to.”

After saying that, Cassadin lightly rested his face on my shoulder. And a few strands of his silver hair that slipped down tickled my neck.

“There’s an incredibly nice scent coming from you, Sister.”

“…”

“I wish time could just stop here. I think I’ll be upset if the others at the imperial palace so much as look at you.”

Here we go again. Where on earth did he learn to talk like that?

“Cassadin, your joke is going too far.”

“It’s not a joke.”

“…why do you keep lying? My little brother.”

I said, pulling my hand away from Cassadin’s.

It was only for a moment, but I felt Cassadin hold his breath.

“Cassadin.”

“…”

“I’m really curious why you keep lying to me.”

I turned my gaze to the scenery outside of the carriage. On top of a large hill covered with reeds, children were frolicking around and laughing. Watching their peaceful interactions and scenery, I then added on,

“But as you always have, you will likely not tell me why. Even so, if…”

I trailed off for a moment, then opened my mouth again.

“If I wish for you to tell me the truth someday, is that too selfish of me?”

Cassadin remained silent. Silence sometimes serves as an answer. In this context, his silence also meant that he admitted he had lied.

“You don’t believe what I said.”

“Did you know Cassadin? When you lie, a corner of your mouth curls up slightly. And your right eyelid trembles very faintly.”

“…”

“You’re quite an unskilled liar, you know.”

Cassadin let out a small chuckle after hearing my observation. A little sigh of disbelief was mixed somewhere in there as well.

“Just who are you, Sister?”

I avoided the question he was testing me with, just like he did with me.

“It looks like we’ve already arrived at the imperial palace.”

Looking around, a palace glittering with a golden sheen came into view.

I often visited the imperial palace since I was a child, since it was also the place where I was brought by my Father while holding his hand in order to heal members of the imperial family.

Those who didn’t know of our family’s healing abilities were all envious of me, holding a strange belief that the emperor had chosen me as the candidate for the Crown Princess. It was a common occurrence for people to criticize others without knowing the details.

“…we’ve finally arrived.”

Cassadin murmured in a soft voice. I took his outstretched hand and got off the carriage. He looked at me as if he had something to say, but when our eyes met, he shut his mouth completely.

“Do you have something to say?”

“It’s just… You’re so beautiful, Sister.”

More nonsense.

“You’ve been very complimentary today. You’re beautiful too.”

“…I’d appreciate it if you’d say I’m handsome.”

“Alright, then, let’s go with handsome.”

I casually accepted his request and entered the imperial palace, holding his hand.

The palace was heavily guarded. It was bustling with imperial knights on standby and people who had been invited to the palace.

The burly knight checking the invitations at the front glanced at Cassadin next to me and coughed.

“Wh-who is your companion?”

He was even stuttering. Wondering why the knight was acting like that, I glanced around the area. It turns out that not just the knights, but other nobles were also sneaking glances at Cassadin.

“Who is he?”

“Oh my. He’s incredibly handsome.”

“It’s my first time seeing him, but he’s so charming.”

All the nobles murmured amongst themselves behind their fans, but maybe my hearing was just that sharp, as I heard everything they said loud and clear.

I purposely responded louder for the nobles to hear.

“This is my younger brother, Cassadin.”

“Earl Serkia family… confirmed. You may go in.”

The moment we stepped foot inside the palace, the exact same scene I had seen in my precious life came into view.

The shimmering chandeliers and lion sculptures were in the center of the room. Everyone’s faces, and their clothes were all the same as my memory.

But the only difference was that I brought Cassadin with me this time.

‘Damian arrived late at the banquet that day.’

I still vividly remember that day when I fell in love with him at first sight. It was on this day that I was hoping for the boring hours of this banquet to end quickly. I remember the buzz of the people behind me as I stepped outside for fresh air to relieve my dizziness from one too many glasses of high-alcohol wine.

‘Goodness. It’s Grand Duke Damian!’

‘I’ve only heard rumors of him…’

‘I heard it’s hard to see him at all because he’s so busy.’

‘He’s so handsome!’

Appearing in the midst of the crowd’s murmurs, Damian gave me a slight grin the moment our eyes met.

And that was the start of my foolish first love, which ultimately led to my death.

“Sister.”

Hearing Cassadin’s voice calling me, I erased my bubbling thoughts and looked up at him. Meeting my gaze, he smiled as brightly as the midsummer sun and said,

“You’re finally looking at me.”

“…”

“What were you thinking about?”

“It’s a secret.”

It was just when he was laughing softly at my response, like a pack of dogs discovering their prey, the young noble ladies who should have been laughing amongst themselves were approaching us.

“Oh my! Lady Serkia! It’s been a long time.”

“…nice to see you, Lady Christine.”

“You remember me. It’s an honor.”

“Well, of course, I remember.”

Christine Ively, from an Earl family like mine, was known for her love of jewels. Her family had amassed their wealth through a diamond mine.

Countless people were sacrificed to mine those diamonds. And I heard that hundreds of slaves died just in that process.

She was also the one who spread the ridiculous rumor that our family had accumulated wealth through a hidden mine to hide that fact.

And the reason our family was targeted among many families was because I had a jewel that she didn’t own.

“Oh, but who is the person next to you?”

Ively’s eyes sparkled as she looked at Cassadin, who was standing right next to me. And looking at the woman who was blushing at him, Cassadin opened his mouth.

“Hello, I’m Cassadin.”

“Oh my, how can his voice be so good as well?”

It was a sight to see Ively with her mouth slightly agape and her cheeks a shade of bright red. Is that what I looked like to others when I fell in love with Damian?

“He is my younger brother.”

All of the noble ladies’ eyes glittered, including Ively. It looked like the other noble ladies, who had just been watching from afar, were now coming this way.

“Your younger brother?”

“As far as I know, isn’t Lady Serkia the only daughter of Earl Jigen?”

“That can’t be!”

One of the noble ladies, who had been quietly watching with a blushing face, suddenly exclaimed, clapping her hands as if she had made some amazing revelation.

“So, was that why you haven’t been appearing in the social circle much? To monopolize your handsome younger brother?”

Was that what they seriously thought?

Though I attended important banquets related to the imperial family, I never attended other events under the firm belief that social circles were a waste of time. I didn’t want to waste my precious mental energy on their petty fights.

It was because I had to consume a considerable amount of mental energy when using my healing ability. The deeper the wound or illness, the more mental energy it consumes.

“You should have told us if there had been someone like this.”

“How could you hide away such a stunning person?”

“Even his skin is unimaginably fair.”

Fortunately or unfortunately, the young ladies all seemed to believe that Cassadin was my younger brother. No, they seemed to want to believe it.

“Excuse me, but do you have a lover, Cassadin?”

In order to take position next to Cassadin like such, that is. All the ladies didn’t seem to have the slightest idea that he used to be a slave. And that in itself was a relief.

“Wait, I was going to ask first!”

“Sir Cassadin, if it’s alright with you, may I invite you to our mansion later…”

“Hey! Don’t cut.”

But then the ladies, including Ively, all started to fight amongst themselves over Cassadin. Who knew bringing Cassadin would attract so much attention?

“I don’t have a lover, but there is someone whom I dare carry in my heart.”

Suddenly, when Cassadin opened his mouth, the ladies who had been glaring each other down went silent. I was also a little surprised because this was the first time I’d heard of it. Eyes wide open, Ively nibbled her lower lip and asked him.

“Who is it?”

When Ively asked him straightforwardly, Cassadin suddenly squeezed the hand that was holding mine. When I looked up at him with a puzzled face, he drew a curved line starting at the corners of his mouth and smiled cutely at me.

“That person was wearing a sky-blue dress revealing her collarbones on the day we first met. There was also a shiny sapphire necklace around her neck.”

“My goodness!”

“I couldn’t take my eyes off her for a single moment. She was so beautiful that it felt like a sin to look away. I apologize to everyone, but my heart already belongs to that woman, so there is no longer any space left for another one.”

At Cassadin’s answer, Ively and the other noble ladies let out a sigh of disappointment. But I was swept up in a strange feeling.

‘…a sky-blue dress revealing her collarbones? A blue sapphire necklace?’

Those were the clothes and necklace I wore when I first met him in the gladiator arena.

I looked at him, thinking that there was no way. When our eyes met, his eyes curled beautifully.

And I vowed to fix that man’s attitude once and for all when we returned home.

“By the way, what’s the name of that person you carry in your heart?”

Cassadin’s announcement just made things a lot more complicated. I tightened my grip on Cassadin’s hand and sent him a silent command not to speak.

But seemingly unaware of my intentions, Cassadin opened his mouth once more.