Tensei Oujo wa Kyou mo Hata o Tatakioru

The Reincarnated Princess’s Sorrow

    Once we left Captain Pascal, we rushed to Commander Lieber’s home as fast as we could.

“Guh!”

    I was in over my head from the wearing fatigue and a lack of sleep. I forced myself towards the sky and take a deep breath of the cold air, swallowing with it the overwhelming nausea that crept up my throat every time we moved.

“Are you alright, Princess?”

    I could hear Sir Leonhard’s voice echoing in my ears. I couldn’t turn back around, but I was sure of the worried face he had.
    Still, I didn’t have the gall to complain at a time like this.

“I’m fine.”

    I continued to face forward, answering as calmly as I could. But perhaps he could tell I was only pretending to be strong, as his large hand briefly grasped mine and squeezed it once before pulling away like he was trying to comfort me.

    It’s true that Commander Lieber’s home was a lot closer to the fort, but it still felt a lot farther than it should have. 
    The sun was breaking through the horizon and flying higher and higher, accompanying the smoke rising from scattered houses dotted in the surrounding.
    The sudden buzz of activity only served to remind us of the passing time.
    It was likely not just me who felt rushed by it. 

    As we rode through a small road accompanied by vast fields on both sides, an isolated building that looked a lot like a small country house stood in the distance.
    Apparently, that was our destination.

    The instant Commander Lieber arrived, he jumped off the horse and bolted towards the front door. Surprised and also a bit worried because of his impatience, I got Sir Leonhard to help me off my horse as fast as he could.

“Latte, you…”

“I’ll stay behind on this one. Let me watch the horses for you.”

    Latte saw us off with a chuckle. Sir Leonhard and I handed him the reins before chasing after Commander Lieber.

“I have returned!”

    Without waiting for a reply, he opened the door and let himself in.
    Only our hasty footsteps and Commander Lieber’s voice echoed within the house. It was eerily quiet inside with almost no signs of people.

    As if rebelling against the silence in the room, my heart beated loudly, like a hammer against a bell.
    Chills ran down my spine. I felt uncomfortable.

“Sven, are you here!?”

“Sir…”

    After calling that name multiple times, someone finally answered.
    A slender-looking man appeared. He was a gentleman in his sixties in butler clothing, with beautiful white hair neatly combed back.

“Sven! How’s Tiana!?”

    Commander Lieber grabbed his thin shoulders.

    The man called Sven averted his gaze downwards to escape the commander’s eyes.
    His grim and deeply wrinkled expression was one that I couldn’t understand, but I could see his dry and cracked lips trembling.

“The Madam is…”

    His voice quivered, just like his lips.
    Asking him of those words he couldn’t say felt dreadfully scary.

    Did we not… make it in time…?

    This conclusion drawn from my fatigued brain power was much simpler than juggling with theories of human emotion. It certainly pointed at the brutal reality.

    A sobbing voice could be heard from the back of the room. A group of women who seemed like servants came out, all huddled together.
    My prediction proved to be right; word by word, everything was set out clearly before me,  like a parent explaining something new to their child.

    We didn’t make it in time…

    These words repeated in my head.
    Before I knew it, the scenery in front of me swayed.

“Princess Marie!”

    Sir Leonhard supported me just as I was about to collapse.
    His hands were cold to the touch. When I looked up at his face, I noticed Sir Leonhard’s complexion was as white as a sheet of paper.

“I-I’m… okay…”

    This wasn’t the time to be lying down on the floor.

    I pulled away from Sir Leonhard and stood on my own. 
    When I looked over at Commander Lieber, he stood there silently, not uttering a single word. I couldn’t read his emotions from this side. His simple act of standing still seemed both calm and absent-minded.

    I didn’t know how much time had passed. Had it been minutes? Seconds?
    It was the commander who finally broke the solemn silence.

“…I see.”

    He didn’t sound upset.
    He said so quietly and gently stroked Sven’s shoulders.

“I’m going to go see Tinny… my wife, now.”

    Commander Lieber slipped past the group of women and disappeared into a room in the back. 
    No words came to me. I didn’t know what to say to him. 

“…I’m terribly sorry that we have been unable to welcome you. I shall prepare some refreshments, so please, this way.”

    As we stood there stunned, the butler Sven called out to us. 
    When I snapped back to reality, I shook my head in a hurry to refuse. 

“Please don’t worry about that.”

    My desire to continue trying to refuse his offer faded as Mr Sven gave us a weak smile, stating with his swollen red eyes, “It will be a good distraction if I move around a bit,” making me unable to refuse any further.

    We were guided through to another room, but I only stared at the interiors distractedly as we walked. 
    There were wooden-coloured beams supporting the plastered white walls. Each pane of the overhanging double pane window were decorated with wooden lattice frames. The curtains were a mix of tassels and laces. Porcelain dolls lined themselves up in a cabinet atop a brick fireplace. Bouquets of dried flowers wrapped in string dotted the walls. 
    Rather than a castle fitting of an aristocrat, it was more like a room straight out of a fairytale. Both the inside and out were filled with things that a woman might like. 
    Commander Lieber probably collected all of the things his wife liked and built it based on that. 

    He probably kept the number of servants to a minimum as well.
    This house was made just for his wife to be able to relax—a castle built entirely for her to live in peace.

“Princess.”

    A voice softly called out as if trying to not alarm me.
    Sir Leonhard took my stiff hand and led me to a sofa. “Let’s have a seat,” he said.
    I was guided to sit on a beige sofa made of fabric with floral upholstery. Its cabriole legs matched the colour of the table, which I think was walnut.

    This small, lovely furniture and gorgeous interior design didn’t suit Commander Lieber in the slightest. But that’s exactly why it was brimming with love for his wife.

“…”

    My throat made a choking sound. The corners of my eyes became hot. I clenched my fists, trying to suppress the tears.

    Was it sadness? Frustration? Anger?
    I couldn’t understand my feelings.

    I didn’t doubt my own actions. 
    I realised that turning one’s own wife into the Demon Lord’s vessel was something that should never be done. But seeing evidence of his love shook my resolve.

    I wonder if there was something I could have done.
    Was there really nothing else I could do?

“Princess.”

    Sir Leonhard knelt on the floor before me. Looking up at me from below, he took his hand and placed it over mine, which was clenched into a fist on the sofa.
    As if blaming my nails for biting into my palm, I slowly opened my hand. As it slowly opened, one of my fingers became entangled in two of his.

“You did the best you could.”

“…!”

“Please stop blaming yourself every time you get hurt. You don’t have to burden yourself with the assertion that you could have done more. You are always too hard on yourself.”

    Sir Leonhard lowered his brows into a worried expression as he spoke, before letting out a strained laugh.
    It seemed that my negativity had reached him.

“…Ernst’s pain and suffering, and even his thoughts for his wife, are things we will never understand. The thoughts that they have for each other are for them, and them alone.”

    He let go of my hand and gently stroked my head.
    The warmth from his hand gradually unravelled my stubborn heart.

    That’s right. It’s arrogant of me to assume that something could have been done.
    Not to mention, the fact that I thought I understood their pain was only my self-righteousness speaking. Nobody asked for it.

“All we can do now is wait… Nothing more.”

    I replied with a small nod.

    Then, as I sniffled and tried to rub my tears, Sir Leonhard loosened the corners of his eyes and wiped them away for me.
    I always felt complicated being treated like a child, but at that moment, his gestures like those of a caring brother comforted my heart.