What Kind Of Newbie Are You?! They Said That “Summoner” Is A Terrible Job, Yet They Call Her The Las

It’s the last day of the Event.

Johann and her friends were moving from forest to forest in search of rare items and ended up reaching the coastline at the edge of the First Layer.

There were no notable Events on the coastline, and in the end, Johann and her friends were unable to obtain unique items.

“Well, reality is just like that sometimes, isn’t it?” they said. Then, they settled in to watch the sunset from the beach.

“We didn’t get any Unique Equipment, didn’t we?” Zecca said.

“Yep, it’s a little disappointing isn’t it?” Johann said. “But…”

“It was fun,” the three of them said simultaneously.

It was such a funny coincidence that they smiled at each other to hide their embarrassment.

“It feels like ‘The adventure we have is the greatest treasure of all!’ or something like that, right?” Zecca said.

“Fufu, wasn’t it?” Johann said.

“… But, I think so too,” Remma said. “It’s because I had so much fun over these past 3 days… Onee-chan and Zecca… you’re both my most prized treasures.”

(What is with this kid… she’s so cute. I want to take off her gorilla costume and take her home,) Johann thought.

“What is this, Johann-san?” Zecca said. “Right now, I’m feeling a throbbing in my chest… is this a disease?”

“What a coincidence, Zecca-chan,” Johann said. “I’m feeling it too.”

“… Huh, what’s wrong with you two?” Remma asked. “… Your eyes are scaring me?”

“Fufu, it’s just your imagination,” the two older women said, clenching their teeth and holding themselves down together to not cross a line.

“URGENT QUEST!!”

And at that moment: a voice came from the sky, and a message window popped up in front of everyone. They tapped it to hear the announcement.

“There are 6 hours left in this fun Event. How is everyone? We’ve scattered a lot of Unique Items, but did you get them?”

“We’ve got something more important!” Zecca cried, fired up. “That kind of stunt won’t work on us!”

“Ufufu,” Johann chuckled.

“Now then, this is an emergency situation. Because everyone got a lot of rare items, the strongest Boss who was confined in the First Layer has woken up in anger.”

“Huh? Is it our fault?” Johann asked, tilting her head in confusion.

Zecca whispered, “I think that’s just part of the Event’s story.”

“Its name is the ‘Pirate King Bandit’. He is the strongest and most heinous boss in GOO’s history! Everyone’s cooperation is essential to defeating this guy. Let’s all defeat the Pirate King together!”

“Pirate King…it’s definitely a new boss…I can’t believe they’re throwing in such a surprise here,” Zecca said. “I’m sure it’s a shame for the people who got killed first.”

Shortly after the announcement, each player was sent a summary of the final quest.

Final Quest “Furious Pirate King” Raid Battle

Location: Pirate’s Cove

Clear Reward: All Items owned by the Pirate King

“We’re lucky!” Zecca cried. “Pirate’s Cove is just around the corner!”

“What should we do? Shall we go?” Johann asked.

“…Yeah, I’m interested,” Remma said.

When they moved to the Pirate’s Cove with Zecca’s guidance, there was a shining magic circle. According to Zecca, it seems to have never existed before.

“I think if you step on this, you will be transported to the area where the boss is, I think?” Zecca said.

“I see……” Johann said.

Then, instead of getting into the magic circle right away, they decided to wait for another player to come. A raid battle is an Event where many players cooperate in the fight, and there is a high possibility that the bosses there will have their stats adjusted to deal with a horde of countless players.

And they end up waiting 3 hours. No other players have arrived yet.

“We don’t have much time left, so should we go alone?” Zecca asked.

“… I think so,” Remma said. “Even if we can’t win in the worst case, if Onee-chan can endure until time-out, we won’t lose any items.”

“That’s fair enough,” Johann said.

Just in case, they move all the cash and items they got from the Event to Johann’s storage. And then, the 3 of them activated the magic circle simultaneously.

They were transferred to a place like an underground lake. The underground cavern was the size of the Tokyo Dome. The floating island in the center of it must be the battlefield. The field had countless craggy rocks scattered about, making visibility poor.

“Gehahahahahaha. Welcome,” a single monster in the center said. “Ye all are like flies flocking to me treasure.”

His body had already rotted away, leaving only bones, but those bones were shining golden. He wears a pirate hat and captain’s uniform and looks exactly like an undead revived by his obsession with treasure.

“That’s the Pirate King Bandit,” Zecca said. “He seems about the size of a normal bandit, doesn’t he?”

“Gehahahahahaha,” Bandit said. “Ye lot seem to be hoarding a lot of me treasure… I’ll be taking that back now.”

And at that moment: a message appeared before the three of them.

“Pirate King Bandit’s System Skill ‘All The World’s Treasures Are Mine’ has been Activated. All Items in players ‘Zekka’, ‘Johann’ and ‘Remma’s Item Storages have been Transferred to Pirate King Bandit’s Item Storage.”

“Huh?” the three of them said simultaneously.

None of them understood what the message just said.

“Wha… What should I do, guys… I don’t have anything,” Johann said, despairing. “Everything’s gone…”

She’d confirmed it with her storage menu. Nothing was left.

“Everything… are you serious?!” Zecca cried.

“Yes… even my summoning stones are gone…” Johann said.

“No way…” Zecca said.

“Then that means I can’t fight,” Johann said.

With all her summoned beasts stolen, Chaos Apocalypse’s “Dark Gene” loses all purpose.

“Gehahahahaha! All the world’s treasures are mine! And I just took them back.”

“Emergency! The items that everyone worked so hard to collect were stolen by the Pirate King! There are 2 ways to get it back. One is to defeat the Pirate King. Then all the treasure stolen by him will be returned. The second is to reduce the Pirate King’s HP by a certain amount and activate ‘Plunderer’s End’. Each time you activate this Skill, items will drop from Pirate King’s storage. But if you lose, all the items you’ve collected so far will be gone! Do your best to defeat him!”

“You’ve got to be kidding me!!” Zecca shouted at the cheery announcement.

“… They’ve got to be joking,” Johann said. “Summoners can’t even fight in a crazy situation like this.”

“Johann-san, please step back,” Zecca said. “I’ll go and get all your precious Virtumon back through ‘Plunderer’s End’ or whatever.”

With Dead or Alive ready, Zecca rushes their enemy.

“URAAAAAAA!”

She with her white blade, infused with her spirit. However, the Pirate King also fought back with a saber. His sword skill was probably set to a high level and is completely impervious to Zecca’s attacks.

“Gehahahahahaha.”

On the other side, Zecca was knocked back.

“Speed Up!”

Remma buffs Zecca with support magic. But just then: the Pirate King turned to Remma. He moves away from Zecca. Then:

“Gehaha… I like that treasure… All Steal.”

And when her enemy raises his hand towards Remma, a tornado-like effect appears from under her feet. Then, Remma was no longer in her gorilla armor, but a normal girl.

“’Gorilla Armor’ has been Moved to Pirate King Bandit’s Item Storage.”

“That.. can’t be…” Remma said, so shocked she dropped on the spot. “My Gorilla Armor is…”

As Zecca clucked her tongue, she strikes the Pirate King repeatedly to keep him from pursuing Remma. However:

“Kuh… this can’t be happening.”

All of Zecca’s attacks missed. The Pirate King disassembles his bone body, kept moving despite it, avoids Zecca’s attacks, and then reassembles behind Lemma. And then he raised his saber.

“REMMA-CHAN!”

Johann tries to carry Remma away, but his attack hits her right leg.

(Kuh…… he just scratched me a little, but my HP is less than half now,) Johann thought.

Once again, she realized that the Metal Slime’s protection is gone. And to even more despair:

“Gehaha… I like that treasure. All Steal.”

From under Johann’s feet, a tornado effect plays out. And the next moment, Johann was stripped of her equipment and stuck in the default completely unequipped model.

“Gehaha… GEHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

“’Chaos Apocalypse’ Armor Set and ‘Magic Ring Z’ have been Moved to Pirate King Bandit’s Item Storage.’”

“Kuh… even my armor… this can’t be happening,” Johann thought.

An overwhelming sense of hopelessness like never before dominated the three of them.

T/N: If there was ever a time when the game’s crappy game design and poor developer’s forethought showed itself, this entire final boss would be it. The Event banned bringing items in to keep a somewhat level playing field, but they made it so that summoner stones and arrows could be brought in because Archers and Summoners are useless without them.

But not, they’re not protected by Bandit’s item-robbing skill. The unequipping is just the horrible icing on this crappy cake. What might be even worse rotten cherry is the implication that Johann’s Limited-Time Event-Only summoning stones might be forfeited, too, since they count as items that Pirate King Bandit can rob players of.

Also: One of my family members has tested positive for COVID and is symptomatic. It’s highly likely I’ve already been infected, but hopefully, the entire household being triple-vaccinated (2 doses plus booster) will make this as painless as it possibly can.

Still, be warned that updates may slow or stop until we’ve all tested negative for it, eventually.