My Pet Human Got Kidnapped by a Wild Human

Before they sneaked into the city, Slair traded with a mountaineer. A fluorite for a cape to hide his appearance. Choco took him in the direction of the carriage. This city was vivacious. A traveling artist was painting for everyone. The theme was the holy scene of the Dragon God came down to the City of Phile. Slair glanced at the painting. That shiny golden dragon on the painting was about half accurate, but what was that human standing on the dragon claw? The man had white hair, dark skin, and green eyes. His body was burly statured with arms thicker than ordinary people’s thighs- Fine, he was getting used to these settings, but what was up with the color?

「Chirp!」 Choco nudged Slair with its nose, motioning him to hide in a corner. From there, Slair stepped on a crate and then climbed on a tree. He saw the carriage, and a couple men surrounded it– Who could use a carriage that they couldn’t enter? If they gifted it to the lady as it was, that would only make her angry.

「What now? The Dragons’ gift doesn’t belong to us. It must be the Dragon God not allowing us to use it.」

「But tomorrow, the city lord will gift our girls to Lord Roberts! Our family doesn’t have the wealth or things to exchange them back!」

「Still can’t pry it open? How about we only kept the bottom, smashed the rest, and called it a flying carpet?」

「I TIRED, BUT THAT’S NO USE! Let’s wait for Jack and others to return!」

「If we wait any longer, the lord’s wife will go back, and we won’t be able to meet her! I don’t understand why. Why does Robert taking so many girls? What is he doing to them? It has been so many years, none of them gave birth to his son!」

Robert. Again, Robert was involved. In fact, Slair did not look like Robert. Slair’s pedigree clearly states the name of his ancestors, and he was sure that there was no Robert in it. However, they were both Jadeites bred by dragons. Placing them among the wild humans was like throwing two hamsters into a pile of voles, which was hard to explain.

Slair picked up a rock and threw it forward. All the men were gathered in front of the carriage; the stone fell behind them, so the guilty thieves quickly turned back. Slair and Choco took the chance, jumped behind the carriage, opened the back window, and got in.

「There is noise from the other side too.」 When someone circled around to look, one of Choco’s hoofs was sucked at the window, and it kicked back onto the human and knocked the man unconscious.

「Hans? Hans! What happened?」

「Oh no. Is this God’s punishment… We shouldn’t steal dragons’ gift.」

「If that’s true, why does Robert never gets punished by God?」

「Both of you quit it right now! If it was up to me, I would say we gift the carriage as it is! We don’t have other choices. Let the lady find a way to open it.」

Today, the city lord’s wife was a little annoyed.

At first, her golden house parade was perfect, but then a group of men tried their best to secretly create obstacles for the ore crabs and made them move slower and slower. Then another group of villagers escorted two men covered in mud from the countryside to the city. They said the two men sneaked into the women’s bathhouse using tunnels, desecrated the girls in the village, and demanded a fair sentence from the lady, preferably stoning the perverts to death.

As the lady felt her good mood was about to get ruined. Things did not end there. The ore crabs she was worried about have changed a new trick today. They rolled down the mountain like falling rocks, and the momentum they built up destroyed many villagers’ stalls. People screamed and ran around in chaos. The biggest ore crab took the lead. It rolled through a small upward slope which sent it up high, then 「Pow-」, it landed on the golden house. The gold ore grabs at the bottom and releases a painful 「Cuckoo.」 Fortunately, the knight reacted quickly and pulled the lady out. Otherwise, she would be smashed by those vile crabs.

At that moment, a third muddy figure rushed down; his sword was the cleaning thing on him. 「Excuse me, excuse me. I accidentally got carried away. Did anyone get hurt?」

「Arrest him!」 The city lord’s wife screamed angrily, and she felt heartache when she thought of her golden house,「Put him with those two perverts and stone them to DEATH!」

「 Dear Lady! We want to gift you this carriage!」

The lady saw a beautiful carriage float toward her- Yes, floating. Its wheels were off the ground, never rotated. The carriage proceeded safely by the trust next to the peasant. Ah, is this the compensation from the Dragon God?

She straightened her hair and walked over elegantly:「 I accept this gift. What are your requests?」

Before the peasants could speak, the carriage door opened suddenly, and a scaled horse leaped out. Slair, riding on Choco’s back, poured a basin of water on the city lord’s wife, then pulled down his hood, revealing his black hair and green eyes:「My apology, my lady. This is not a gift for you but a joke. I am reluctant to insult women, but my father, Lord Robert, ordered me to do so. He said the girls you sent over were too ugly.」

Choco pulled the carriage briskly around the stunned lady and her followers. Slair happily pulled those three muddy figures into the carriage. The villagers tried to stop him, but a giant bird covered in burning flames flew down and squealed at them.

The carriage galloped away with Slair’s voice in the wind: 「Right, these people didn’t mean to offend you all. My father said a narrow-minded woman like you would definitely not want to gift him the most beautiful girls. Thus, he let someone dig a tunnel secretly to check the girl’s appearance here. Then he said, the girls here are as ugly as you. It must be the environment. He won’t blame you for that, but in the future, don’t force yourself to gift those girls to him.」

「My lady, do you want to chase after them?」 The knight captain asked,「He is so rude, and his identity is suspicious too. I haven’t heard Lord Robert has a son…」

「Shut up!」 The city lord’s wife stomped on him angrily 「 Look at his face and that disgusting tone. Who else could give birth to a son like that except Robert? And that carriage, obviously, was a gift from the dragons. That bastard is a psycho. It wouldn’t be a surprise if he refused to tell people he has a son.」

「But he offended you…」

「As long as that bastard holds gifts from the dragons, we can’t break off with him.」 The city lord’s wife boarded her retinue’s carriage, 「Head back.」

Slair’s carriage was soon out of the city. Phile bird shrank its body, stood on Slair’s shoulder, and looked at the two muddy dragons and a muddy figure with disgust. Alex and Rhett were embarrassed and went for a bath first. Grieve sat next to Slair, but he was covered in mud, so he kept some distance in between.

「Phile,」Slair tapped at the phile bird’s head,「You have been watching from the sky. Why didn’t you come to help Dad and Daddy earlier?」

「Jeep!」 (They are so Humiliating!)

「Why don’t you go help Grieve?」

「Jeep！GeeGee!」 (How do I suppose to recognize a lump of mud!)

「I mean, my appearance is not that much better than theirs.」 Slair grabbed a piece of grass from his hair, and at that exact moment, the vein he used as a temporary belt snapped apart with a 「pop」.

「…」Grieve looked down at Slair’s belt in his hand.

「… Forget it. We are in the carriage anyway.」 Slair took off his pants calmly, took Grieve’s hand, and pointed at the bathroom, 「When Dad and Daddy come out, let’s go together!」